Wednesday, February 25, 2009

Bill Gates Chooses Heaven or Hell

Bill Gates arrives at the port to heaven and hell. Petrus says : You see Bill, we don't know what to do with you. You may choose "heaven" or "hell".

Bill peeks in heaven and sees a couple of old boring men sitting around at a table. Bill takes a look in hell and sees really beautiful women, sex, drugs, rock and roll, and most of all, gambling.

So Bill says : I am a gambling man, I want to go to hell! Once in hell, Bill is immediately thrown into the fire. So Bill says : hey, what the hell is this, I saw all the gambling, the women, and sex?

The devil says: 'That was just a demo version."


Giving Thanks and Credited to: http://www.casinos.net/billgateschoosesheavenorhell.htm

Monday, February 23, 2009

Lost Shirt

A successful businessman flew to Vegas for the weekend to gamble. He lost the shirt off his back, and had nothing left but a quarter and the second half of his round-trip ticket.

If he could just get to the airport he could get himself home. So he went out to the front of the casino where there was a cab waiting.

He got in and explained his situation to the cabby. He promised to send the driver money from home, he offered him his credit card numbers, his driver's license number, his address, etc., but to no avail. The cabby said, "If you don't have fifteen dollars, get the hell out of my cab!"

So the businessman was forced to hitchhike to the airport and was barely in time to catch his flight.

One year later the businessman, having worked long and hard to regain his financial success, returned to Vegas, and this time he won big. Feeling pretty good about himself, he went out to the front of the casino to get a cab ride back to the airport.

Well, who should he see out there, at the very end of a long line of cabs, but his old buddy who had refused to give him a ride when he was down on his luck. The businessman thought for a moment about how he could make the guy pay for his lack of charity, and he hit on a plan.

The businessman got in the first cab in the line, "How much for a ride to the airport," he asked? "Fifteen bucks," came the reply. "And how much for you to give me sexual favors on the way?" "What?! Get the hell out of my cab!"

The businessman got into the back of each cab in the long line and asked the same questions, with the same result. When he got to his old friend at the back of the long line, he got in and asked, "How much for a ride to the airport?" The cabby replied, "Fifteen bucks." The businessman said, "Okay" and off they went. As they slowly drove past the long line of cabs, the business man gave a big smile and thumbs up sign to each driver.


This Casino Joke is credited and thanks to http://www.casinojokes.net/lostshirt.htm

Wednesday, February 18, 2009

Internet Casino Lottery

https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgty51NV-cRJsv46rT0SC47yfmbD2XaVmzzYUvVo3As2mcf52GDXFU5_eYjd-70cGta_jpR8wqXNT60CIXKEGffzH2l4426AF1AiDXvXN0uZbPZhyRksyKVbUNSyMxroZIiw740NWtUVJc/s1600-h/by_noon.jpg

A man rushes into his house and yells to his wife, "Clara!, i want you to pack up your things. I just won the lottery in an internet casino!"


Carla replies, "Shall I pack for warm weather or cold?"

The man responds, "I don't care. Just so long as you're out of the house by noon!"



The credits for the joke goes to the place where you can find tons casino jokes is at CasinoJokes.net